Today an incident took place which forced me to reflect on past instances when my personal space has been invaded to such an extent, I have felt violated and vulnerable. There is no term or phrase (that I can think of at the moment) that can really explain these occurrences, so I’ve coined the term social assault.
Definition:
so·cial as·sault [ sṓshəl ə sáwlt]
Instances when an individual demeans, invades, and/or disregards another’s space without consent while simultaneously not causing sufficient injury to warrant an arrest.
Twice this week I was socially assaulted. The two instances are very different from one another; but ultimately both had me feeling powerless and vulnerable.
The first occurred on my way to work one morning. I was making my way down the infamous Georgia Avenue in DC towards the Shaw-Howard metro station. My pace was fast and steady, my eyes fixated on the newest book in my possession. Walking-reading-walk-read…. That was my pace.
While almost to my destination I passed by two young men boys. I was startled to overhear one of them say,
“I can’t stand them Howard bitches, they act so stuck up.”
A bit frightened and confused I picked up my pace, stopped reading my book, and headed into the metro station. Sadly it wasn’t the first time I heard someone refer to me as a bitch or make generalizations about the HU community… so that part didn’t upset me too much. But it was how the statement was said. There was this fiery intensity behind this young man’s voice… filled with rage, anger, malice. It was one of such clear deep rooted hatred that I thought he would get up from his seat and at any moment and physically attack me. Needless to say, that incident left a sour impression on me for the rest of my day.
The second incident was more covert (and legal). It happened at a Smithsonian gallery.
Sidebar: Even when it is for my protection, I hate being searched. Privacy is a very important concept for me. And bag searches (yes, even at museums) feel demeaning and intrusive.
So in visiting the gallery, I am required to open my handbags and show a security officer its content. Needless to say I felt like a criminal while being poked, prodded and questioned. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the need for searches at certain public buildings, but for my sanity I’ve resolved from this day forward I will not bring any totes or backpacks with me when I frequent those places.
So I want some feedback on this one… what do you think of my definition of social assault? Let me know what you think of my two experiences and share an instance when you have been socially assaulted.
